Total, Unabashed Sobbing Frustration

I woke up this morning with a 6-7 headache on the cluster Kip scale. Even when / if not a true “cluster” headache, this scale is more useful having been written specifically about head pain, and it corresponds exactly to my own internal scale. 1-3, shadow pain, don’t need to treat. 4, getting bad, time for Imitrex. 6-7, I am sad and shut in a dark room fully medicated. 8-10 vomiting, can’t lie still, ER.

Oxygen didn’t work. That was discouraging. I broke open my injectable sumatriptan cartridge and stuck myself. Even that hasn’t fully worked. I was full of optimism about the girls’ summer this year and guess what, Summer Day Two, and Day Two of me not being able to get out of bed. I am frustrated, I am in tears, I am depressed, hopeless, scared. I want some damn pills. I want to take that blog back I wrote last night. I want to be with my children.

Sometimes a life with migraine is no life at all.

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